a short, sweet note and how it got me to [finally] blog again

Hello and happy 2016! 

I woke up this morning and promised myself I wouldn't end the day without getting a blog post up. It's been nearly three months and while I've missed this space, I haven't even considered making an attempt at coming back until today and I have Lauren at Lot 48 to thank for getting me here today. See, I don't have a huge following on here and that's never bothered me much. I've always promised myself that I would write as long as it meant something to me and if other people enjoy it, well, that's just a bonus. This isn't the first time I've gone MIA from this space and I always know I'll make it back eventually. 

Yesterday, though, I received a comment from Lauren on a recent Instagram post telling me she missed my reading my blog and hopes I write again soon. This meant so much to me. While I will always come back and write because it's what I enjoy doing, there is a lot to be said for writing in a way that engages others, that connects you with people you don't know, that other people can relate to and when you don't have hundreds of people following and commenting on your posts, you can't help but wonder if anyone is out there at all. Over the last few months I've had so much to share and so many things to say but couldn't motivate myself to actually do anything about it. Lauren's encouraging comment gave me that extra little push I needed to show up here today and I'm super grateful. 

Moral of the story: if you have anything nice to say to anyone -- anything at all, say it. It could be exactly what they needed to hear. 

I'm going to leave it at that for now, but I'll be back tomorrow basically cramming the last almost 3 months into a blog post. Spoiler alert: expect lots of puppy photos.

I hope you had a happy holiday season and that 2016 is off to a fabulous start for all of you!

When there's so much you want to do so you don't do any of it.

Hello hello! I'm hopeful that someday I will have a consistent posting schedule but I have officially accepted that it's not going to happen right now. I'm okay with it. I have good intentions every day after work to go to boot camp, come home and cook dinner, then do any of the millions of things I want to get accomplished, including blogging. Instead, I come home from boot camp,  maybe cook dinner and feel so overwhelmed with everything I want to do that I end up doing nothing productive at all.

I'm suffering from a major lack of focus lately. I'm all over the place when I just need to decide to do one thing at a time really well. This past week was a little different because Jonathan's sisters are in town and so are our sweet nieces and nephew which means I don't feel bad at all about skipping out on our evening to do list for all of this happiness lately:

It's been quite a week! We even went out on a Wednesday night which is pretty rare for us. That photo up there is from our dinner on Wednesday at Prato in Winter Park. It was somehow my first time there even though it's been open for a few years now and it was amazing. The shrimp ravioli, the pizza, the drinks and especially the company -- perfection. We go through phases where we are in such a routine on the weeknights that we forget we are a young married couple who should go out in the middle of the week every now and then and have a little fun. Sometimes we need a night like that to remind ourselves that fun and spontaneity don't have to be reserved for the weekends.

Oh and that sweet angel baby up there is our newest niece, Ella. I'm feeling pretty lucky lately to be an aunt to so many beautiful children. It's the sweetest thing.

Switching gears, I'm writing this on Saturday morning and I'm parked in Starbucks because this seems to be the only way I stay focused long enough to crank out a few quality blog posts. It feels good to be here not worried about the stuff I wanted to do around the house today.

Speaking of our house, our laundry room got quite the makeover last week and I am over-the-moon excited about it. I never thought I'd use the words laundry and excitement in the same sentence but right now I absolutely am. Adulthood, you are funny to me. I have a few more finishing touches to make but hopefully I can show you all the beauty and joy that is our new laundry room later this week.

Happy Monday to all of you. Here's to a week of more focus and more fun.

My return from an unintentional blogging break

Well, there I went and took another unintentional blogging break. I have no reasonable excuse other than the fact that I forgot to blog for a few weeks and when I would try to convince myself to come home from work and write something - anything, I just couldn't even bring myself to sit down at the computer. Writing is a lot like exercise for me. It's a good habit and once I get into a habit, I can't imagine not doing it. But just like exercise, if I take a few weeks off, it gets harder and harder to get myself to start again. The good news is my exercise routine is on point right now so it's time to turn my attention to writing and bring this blog to life again.

The timing couldn't be better. After a weekend full of social events and festivities, I'm enjoying my Labor Day at home alone while Jonathan is working. I feel like it's been a hectic several months, but then again I think I always feel that way. Anyway, I am enjoying having nothing I really have to do today. I got up and went to boot camp, picked up groceries and planned our meals for the week, cleaned up around the house, watched an episode of Friends and before I knew it, I had a few hours to kill before starting dinner. It was like the stars aligned and I knew I just needed to hop on the opportunity to pay a visit to this deserted place I love so much.

I haven't blogged since what, June? We have lots to catch up on and I'll get you all up to speed eventually, but right now I just want to share what's on my heart today. 

I used to keep a gratitude journal by my bed and it was my intention every night to make a short list of things I was thankful for before I crawled into bed each night. It was a good habit and I need to pick it back up. No matter what went on each day, it helped me focus on all good things before drifting off to sleep. I'm going to make every effort to get back into this habit so today, I am using this blog as my gratitude journal. Right now, here are just a few of the things I'm feeling ever so grateful for.

• I mentioned Jonathan had to work today. I woke up not long after he left for the day and came into the kitchen to find the book in the photo above and his coffee mug sitting on the kitchen table. I didn't roll my eyes because this husband of mine didn't clean up after himself. Instead, I smiled to myself because in his every day rush to get out the door this morning, this man I love so much sat down to enjoy his coffee and spend a few minutes reading His Word. He then texted me a while later telling me he left the book out for me to read the same pages. I'm so thankful not only for his faith, but for him helping me and inspiring me to grow stronger in my faith. 
• We've spent the last few days having all kinds of fun with friends and family. After a double date with my friend, Laura and her soon-to-be hubby on Friday night and an awesome day/night with Jonathan's group of friends from high school and their significant others, I feel so lucky to have such great friendships in our lives. I'm especially thankful that Jonathan's friends have become mine and visa versa and that their significant others are women I'm so proud and lucky to call my friends. We closed our weekend with a birthday celebration for my dad and it goes without saying that I am forever grateful for our family.
• I'm super thankful for Pinterest. I feel like I was over it for a while and just didn't have any desire to hop on and pin away. Lately, with a few things we want to do in the house, I've been back on looking for inspiration and ideas and it's like I've fallen in love with it all over again. 
• It's September and while the weather doesn't exactly change for the better quite yet here in Orlando, just knowing it's only going to get better from here makes me really happy. With summer ending, it means Jonathan will start to slow down a bit at work and we have a lot of fun things to look forward to in the next few months. 
• I'm thankful for God's love and grace. I can be stubborn and impatient and I have a hard time finding strength and patience when things don't go the way I planned. I'm thankful because He knows my heart and he loves me anyway. He also knows what he's doing in our lives and he's got it under control. Knowing this brings me peace and comfort in those moments of frustration and impatience.

I think I'll leave it that for now. I hope you've all enjoyed the long weekend. Let's make it a great week!

New Blog Design (Yay!) and a Few Other Things on Friday

Oh hey there. It’s been quiet around here this week, I know. I’ve been a little distracted and I have been working on a few posts for next week -- but in the meantime, Sarah has been working on this amazing new blog design for me and I’m so excited about it!

If you visit here often, you know what this space looked like before and oh my goodness is this a huge improvement or what?!?

Guys, really. I’ve been blogging for almost 5 years and I finally decided it was time to ask someone who knows what they’re doing to design my space here. I’ve been using what little design skills I have and just making the best of it but I’m so glad I finally asked a professional for help.

For the record, Sarah is great. I think we all know that by now but it had to be said. I had very little idea of what I wanted this space to look like when I first contacted her and somehow she turned the very little bit of guidance I gave her into something so perfectly me. Isn't it so pretty and happy and just absolutely wonderful?

We are still finalizing a few minor details, but I can't say enough about how excited I am to share the new design with all of you!

A few other things:

- Life has been hectic lately and I find myself craving a date night at home like woah. We’ve got this brand new hammock on the back patio, wine on hand and the fixings for a delightful dinner at home tonight. Our Friday night is shaping up to be just what we need.

- I read The Girl on the Train this week and finished it in oh, two days. Most of the books I've read this year I've heard about through this awesome blogging community and I just love that. This book definitely lived up to the hype if you ask me!

- I really really want to order the May Kindness Box. I became aware of this box a while back and I follow the Instagram account. If you haven't heard of it, the goal of these boxes is to send a little happiness. Each box comes with 4-5 items to uplift and inspire you. Every month when the new box becomes available I forget about it but this month, I really want to order it. Early birthday treat for myself maybe?

source

-  Joining the women’s bible study at church is probably the best decision I’ve made this year. We finished Beth Moore’s Breaking Free study in March and this month, started Lisa Harper’s Hebrews study. I genuinely look forward to Tuesday nights – the fellowship, the conversation, the time dedicated to growing closer to Jesus. It’s been such a blessing!

- I just watched last night's episode of Grey's Anatomy. Yes, I still watch this show. I'm not going to admit to sitting in bed sobbing throughout the entire episode, but I'm also not going to deny it.

On that note, I should really get moving and do something productive with myself. Cheers to new blog designs and weekend fun! 

Just Write

I'm sitting on our back porch this evening and it's a glorious 73 degrees outside. I'm enjoying the most beautiful breeze and the sun is shining so bright through the trees it is nearly blinding but it doesn't bother me a bit. I'm also sipping a glass of red wine and even though Jonathan just asked me if I want to go to the gym, I'm not giving up on this glass of wine.

See, I have the urge to write and as strong as it is, I just don't know what to say. I have so many blog ideas that pop into my head throughout the day and it seems as soon as I sit down to get it out, I have nothing interesting to say. The ideas are there, but the words...they either aren't there or they feel forced.

There is no better feeling to me than sitting down to write and watching the words just flow right out. It still happens to me quite often and it's the reason I still have this blog...it's the reason I can say with certainty that I will always write. It's also the reason I sometimes have a difficult time blogging.

See, I want to write random posts that don't say anything particularly important about myself, I want to link up for Wedding Wednesday and share our beautiful day, but I don't enjoy those posts nearly as much as I enjoy sharing my honest thoughts on what's going on in my life. The only problem is, I don't want to be constantly pouring my heart out here for the world to see. Don't get me wrong, I don't just mean the not so happy stuff, but the good things, too...the absolutely wonderful things. Even as a blogger, I still worry about sharing too much. I love the thought of writing about and documenting my relationship...my marriage, where I stand on having children and how I feel about my career, but I also know that some things aren't meant to be shared with the world.

I don't worry about being criticized for anything I say. As a matter of fact, I know that the great thing about blogging is that no matter what you  have to say, there are others out there who will relate to it, learn from it, connect with you because of it. I guess I struggle because as much as I love the idea of sharing these things, I also value the importance of keeping certain things private.

I also think blog posts sharing what we did over the weekend, wedding details, my views on BuzzFeed quizzes and other light-hearted topics are absolutely necessary as well. Nobody wants to read a deep, thought-provoking and honest post day in and day out. There's gotta be a little bit of both.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm struggling as a blogger lately. I want to find that balance where I'm still getting the joy and fulfillment I need out of writing all while maintaining some level of privacy in my life.

I know it's easy to wonder why it matters, why I should obviously keep all details of my life to myself rather than posting it for the world to see, even why anyone blogs at all. But it matters to me. I love writing and sharing, even if it with the small following I have here. I don't claim to be a big deal blogger or even a legendary writer. What I write on here may not matter to anyone other than me and that's okay. I just need to make sure I'm doing it in a way that satisfies me and my passion. Maybe I just need to say what I want to say, share what I want to share and not worry about sharing too much. I don't know.

Does anyone else struggle with this sometimes? How do you find a balance with your blog topics?

On Losing my Spunk....and Getting it Back

This post has been sitting in my draft folder for about a week and after debating whether to post it or not, it's time to just put it out there. Writing has always been a way for me to sort out my feelings and reflect and this post is just that...a stream of thoughts as I took some time to really reflect on what I've been feeling.

I'm going to get real honest and open here and I hope you can bear with me. I guess you could say I recently had a bit of an epiphany and this is my way of working through it all.

I’ve felt for some time now the nagging feeling that I am not who I used to be. Most of who I am hasn't changed at all, but I was feeling like lost a bit of myself. I couldn’t explain in detail what that even meant, but I’ve been in a long-term funk and I’m just now coming out of it and making sense of it all.

Meeting Jonathan just over a year ago was the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. I love this man so much it hurts and I honestly still can’t believe we found each other. After meeting him, my life changed dramatically at a pretty fast pace. It’s no secret that things moved super fast for us and I’m so glad it did. When you know, you know and this was absolutely true for us.

This meant big life changes came at warped speed to my life and while they were changes for the better, it was a lot at one time. I quickly began spending more of my time at Jonathan’s instead of my house resulting in tension with friends and roommates, getting used to a new town and new friends and family and settling into our life together. A marriage proposal wasn’t too far behind which led to wedding planning stress, selling and moving out of my home into our home, saying goodbye to my puppy as we needed to find a new home for him then getting married just a few months later. I deal with change pretty well but when you go through so many life changes in a short time, no matter how amazing it all is, it still takes a toll on you.

Until I met Jonathan, I held onto the hope that my story would unfold this way but when it actually happened, I was (and sometimes still am) in absolute disbelief. All this excitement and joy in my life over the last year or so has been such a blessing, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t allow it to have its not-so-positive effects on me.

Just over a year ago, I was in the best shape of my life. I was at my ideal weight (although I wouldn’t have minded losing a little) and I was working out just about every day. It happens to a lot of us when we fall in love and our priorities change a little, but my healthy habits soon started to disappear. I went from being independent and heading to the gym straight from work, then coming home and eating oatmeal for dinner to wanting to go home and cook dinner for us, to spend quality time together and cuddle, to watch How I Met Your Mother while enjoying a few glasses of wine and staring into each others’ eyes. I’m just kidding on that last one…we aren’t quite that cheesy, I promise. Needless to say, I stopped taking good care of myself and I am the only one to blame. Health is a priority and I had all the support in the world to continue healthy habits, but I am the one who let myself down. 

Not only did I stop taking care of myself physically, but I let stress and other negative things change my attitude. I used to be so…sunshiney. My sister used to tease me for making small talk with the Target cashier because I was just overly friendly. I used to say ‘Count your rainbows, not your thunderstorms’ at least once a day, but somehow over time, I’ve allowed my thunderstorms to take up too much space in my head…in my heart. I used to do what I wanted without worrying how others would react. I was spontaneous and silly. I would dance, blast Taylor Swift, twirl, laugh…all things that made me absolutely giddy. I don’t feel like I’ve lost it completely, but I've definitely lost touch with certain qualities that make me who I am.

It took me a while to even notice the changes in my appearance, my attitude, my confidence. I’ve slowly, little by little lost control over these things. It’s taken me even longer to really think about what happened here and how I can come out of this even better than I was before. I can take responsibility for letting life get the best of me. It’s me who stopped taking care of myself and making fitness and health a priority. It’s me who let stress, drama with friends and unhappiness at work impact my attitude and the way I live my life.

After thinking about this a lot lately, I keep coming back to the whole concept of confidence. Confidence for me isn’t just about my looks. It’s about my attitude, my energy level, my state of mind, my health in general, my friendships, it’s about what I invest in making myself the best me I can be. These things are all related to each other for me. It’s certainly true that I’ve become less spontaneous and silly because I don’t love the way I look. I’m not happy with my body, so my confidence is down. My confidence is down, so unintentionally, I stay under the radar and don’t put myself in the spotlight. I end up criticizing myself and letting the negative thoughts win, so I end up taking myself too seriously and unable to loosen up and twirl around the house like I used to. One small thing impacts everything else in my life.

For example, I had so much drama with my friends/roommates when Jonathan and I first starting seeing each other and even until we got engaged. It got really bad and I feel like even that trickled down to my attitude and my confidence level. I let the negativity affect me in even more ways than making me a little stressed and ended up changing how I acted and how I approached friendships because of what happened with a few individuals. 

The funny thing about all of this is that I've found someone to spend my life with who does nothing but build me up. I spend my days with someone who loves all of me, every day. He celebrates me while supporting me and inspiring me to be better. He sees in me what I don't see in myself and I'm so thankful for his constant love and support. While it's such a blessing to have this support, I need to be sure I am viewing myself in the same light and making it a a priority to do what I need to do to be the kind of person I want to be.

If I want to feel more confident, I need to invest the time and work into improving myself. I know feeling confident in who I am and how I present myself will help me get my groove back, so to speak. I’ll be confident enough again to tell the biggest Debbie Downer I know to count their rainbows, to be myself and not be afraid of what will be said when I leave the room, to dance and laugh and be the positive, energetic, outgoing person I know am.

For some reason, rather than committing to taking control of the situation, I’ve let it get so big that I didn’t even know where to start to get back where I was. This blog post has been a long time coming and truth be told, it just took some time for me to really reflect on things and figure out what is actually wrong. Being completely honest with myself in this situation has taken time and bravery, not to mention posting it on the Internet for all to see. The funny thing is I am and have been so absolutely happy with my life. I haven't been depressed or unhappy and I have never had a doubt in my mind that I am right where I need to be in life...with the right person, in the right place and in the right time. I've just let a little part of me go...a part of me that I miss and a part of me that will help me leave the world a better and happier place. I need my spunk back, that's for sure.

The good news is that it’s still me. I’m still here, I’m in complete control of how I feel and I have the best support system I could ask for…an endlessly supportive husband who disagrees with every negative thing I might think about myself, a loving family and God who gives me strength and love no matter what the situation.

The Internet is a funny place, especially the blog world. Whether it’s a blog post or a Facebook post, it’s only a glimpse into someone’s life. Most of the time, we only share the good stuff because it is much prettier and easy to look at but life isn’t perfect all the time and there are some parts of life that aren't as shiny even though the shiny stuff is what most of us choose to put out there on the Internet. It scares me to share my personal thoughts and challenges like this, but writing…it’s therapeutic to me and maybe someone will read this and be able to relate to it, or  maybe they won’t. Either way, it’s out there and I feel better already. 

This Post is Bad for Your Diet

Just last week as I vowed to be a better blogger, it struck me that I should probably give this space a little face lift while I'm being ambitious. I wanted to simplify things a bit and change up the color scheme. I'm no blog designer, but I have to say I'm pretty happy with how this thing turned out! I've made a few updates to my About page and promise to get better about sharing my favorite recipes with you all again. There are already a few of my favorites under the Recipes tab, but I've been cooking and baking like crazy lately, so there is a lot more to come!

In addition to giving a little TLC to this happy space, our weekend was pretty great. Saturday we spent the afternoon with my new father-in-law and went to see Lone Survivor. You guessed it, the boys definitely picked the movie and even though some of the war scenes were hard for me to watch, I thought the movie was great. After the movie, we grabbed a bite to eat and went grocery shopping to stock up on everything we needed to host brunch at our house after church on Sunday. I also spent Saturday night baking these babies...

Those are Orange Creamsicle cupcakes...with a marshmellow cream filling. I can't put into words how magical our house smelled while these were in the oven. The recipe is here if you want to experience this for yourself. They are currently hiding out in our freezer so they don't disappear before I have chance to bring them to my brother-in-law this weekend for his birthday.

...and then there was Sunday, which was basically the best day ever. It was one of those days you have a goofy smile plastered across your face and you don't even realize it. We woke up bright and early to meet our friends for the early service at church. After church, we all met back at our house for brunch and I have to say, my husband and I did a damn good job putting it together. Jonathan's parents came over too, and we all spent the morning eating and drinking and laughing...there was lots of laughing. We made eggs, bacon, fruit salad, corn muffins and I tried this awesome recipe for Cinnamon Crescent Rolls. Between that and all the necessities for mimosas and the perfect bloody mary, we had quite the spread. 

Yes, that is bacon in my bloody mary. Yes, it was amazing. 

We were all having just way too much fun with this brunch business. After a few drinks, we decided to take our party on the road and walked/biked up the street to the bar. I have to add that while my mother-in-law and I road bikes, most of our group walked, but my husband, he roller bladed choosing not to bring a change of shoes. It was quite the scene watching him roll into and around the bar. We all had an absolute blast and our simple little brunch turned into a long day of fun. 

I'm not going to lie, though, we were pretty hungover (already) by the time everyone left around 5:00. We spent the rest of our weekend watching several episodes of Breaking Bad. Jonathan's already watched the series, but he's watching it again with me. We just finished season 4 and well, I just wish we weren't adults so we could still be watching right now. Instead, it's Monday and we're back to work, but only for a few days, then we're off to Destin for the weekend! 

I hope you all had a wonderful weekend! 

it's a new day.

Hi, remember me?

I know it's been pretty quiet around here lately. 

With the wedding less than 4 months away and trying to coordinate the sale of my house, along with moving out of it, the thought of sitting down to blog hasn't been very appealing.

Honestly, I've let it all become too much to handle. My coping skills have gone completely out the window and to make matters worse, Jonathan has been feeling the same way. We are both at our limit right now, that's for sure. He's working 6 days a week and his one day off is typically spent in our wedding prep class, attending some wedding related meeting, making wedding decisions, etc.

Outside of work, my free time has been spent going through my house trying to figure out what to throw away, what I need to put in storage, what I can go ahead and move over to Jonathan's until the wedding, what I am going to bring to my parents' house while I stay with them for the next few months and what to give away. Switching gears from wedding planning, to house packing, to negotiating closing details has just been making my head spin.

We are both keeping things in perspective knowing that all the stress now is for a much greater cause and will be so worth it. We absolutely cannot wait to be married on January 3 and we know that the headache-inducing decisions we are making on what we think are silly things like linens, cups, table sizes, etc., are all going to be so worth the headaches when we are celebrating with our loved ones the day we are married. We know this. We know the sale of my house so quickly is an absolute gift from God. We'll be extra thankful when we come home from our honeymoon and don't have to deal with the stress of selling/renting/moving out of my house. We know this.

That doesn't mean we don't let everything get to us now and again. Our coping skills aren't where they should be because we are just weighed down by everything going on in our lives. There have been so many times lately where I've let a small hiccup get me so upset and worked up. In those moments, it's like I'm watching myself and thinking, "This isn't  you. You're better than this. You don't let things like this get you down. Who are you and what have you done with the optimistic, happy, rainbows and sunshine Amanda you used to be?"

I can recognize that I'm not dealing with things as I should be, that the stress I'm under is making it difficult for me to cope as I normally would. I can also recognize that this doesn't mean I've changed or become someone I didn't want to be. This isn't permanent. I know they'll always be something to stress about and worry is a part of life, but I need to not carry the burden of that stress and worry. I need to have faith and understanding that everything will be okay and my worrying won't make a bit of difference in the outcome.

The good news?  In just a few days, I'll hand over the keys to my house and with it, much of my stress and anxiety will be gone. The stress of being a landlord and friend, the stress of HOA payments, the stress of trying to keep up with the needs of a house I only spend a few days a week at. This will be gone. Sure, you can bet I'll shed a tear over this chapter of my life coming to a close, but that's another post for another day.

I'm really looking forward to the time I'll spend at my parents' house over the next few months, spending the hour or so before bedtime reading or relaxing rather than cleaning out my garage and being able to truly enjoy the final stages of planning our wedding since my focus won't be on my house anymore.

The even better part? This is all leading up to starting the new year marrying the absolute man of my dreams, moving in with him, making his home our home and enjoying life as husband and wife.

What I'm also trying to say here is that I'm back. I want to get back to writing regularly and enjoying it. I'm looking forward to filling you all in on some more wedding details and share everything else I've been up to. I really do love this blog and I'm excited to be able to make this a priority again.

I hope you're all doing well!

Life Lately

I've been neglecting this blog of mine quite a bit lately and I'm trying to fix that. Truth is, with wedding planning and traveling for work recently, I just haven't found any free time where I've wanted to sit down and write a blog post. Since my life has been consumed with wedding stuff, I thought I'd link up for Wedding Wednesday (for the first time) and fill you in on what I've been up to lately.

I did travel to Philadelphia at the end of July for my annual work trip. The trip went well and we came home with a handful of new clients which was awesome. I didn't love being away from home for a whole week, but I did get to catch up with a very good friend of mine from college, so that was a huge bonus! We might have had one too many margaritas and I followed that up with going on a Duck Tour with my coworkers the next morning. This was a terrible decision. Hangovers and a bumpy tour bus that splashes into the water do not go well together.

In other news, we have crossed so many things off our wedding to do list and even though I find myself only stressing out more about all the things we still have left to do, I'm so happy to say we've crossed the following things off our list:

Created our Registry

We decided to register at Crate & Barrel and Bed, Bath & Beyond and wanted to try and get both done on Saturday. I was a little worried Jonathan would check out after the first store (I even joked about bringing bacon in my purse to cheer him up), but he was so wonderful. We had such a blast choosing the items we'd like for our home. I'll try to share some of our favorite registry items in a separate post if I get a chance. It was an awesome day!

Booked Honeymoon

I couldn't wait to book our honeymoon knowing that having this amazing trip to look forward to would help us cope with the stress of wedding planning and busy schedules over the next few months. After looking at all-inclusive options in Jamaica, Costa Rica and the Dominican Republic, we decided on Secrets Royal Beach Punta Cana. I'm so excited. This is going to be the perfect place to celebrate our honeymoon and I know it will be absolutely unforgettable.

Booked Wedding Night Hotel

I booked our wedding night hotel this week and will be calling to block rooms at this hotel and one other for guests before the week is over. It's small details like this I want to get out of the way now so I don't have to deal with it closer to the wedding.

Scheduled Engagement Session

We scheduled our engagement photo shoot for September 14, but we haven't decided on an exact location and haven't even started thinking about what we'll wear. Any tips, advice, ideas on this are so welcome!

There is still so much to do, but I am pretty impressed with us since we've accomplished all of this just in the last week. We also just realized our number of anticipated guests is way over the limit for our venue. This has me freaking out a bit, but I'm assuming a handful of people will be unable to make it for the wedding. As much as I'd love everyone we love to be there, here's hoping some of them won't bring dates, children, etc. The guest list might be the most stressful part so far.

There you have it. An update on my life. Work has been super busy since I returned from my trip and our free time and weekends have been full of wedding planning and trying to get some time together to just relax. We're heading to the beach this weekend with some friends, so I'm looking forward to some down time. We also have our first wedding prep course at the church on Sunday morning and I can't wait for that!

What's new with you?

Linking up for Wedding Wednesday!

Everyone has an opinion

Happy Wednesday, everyone!

Today I'm going on a bit of a rant and I hope you don't mind.

When Jonathan and I got engaged just a few weeks ago, I had so many questions for him. How long have you been planning this? When did you get the ring? Oh, is that what you were doing the day you said you had a "work thing?" Did your family know you were about to propose? Who else did you tell?

He filled me in on the details and told me that while his family was fully supportive of his plans, several friends, neighbors, acquaintances he told weren't quite so supportive. He said he stopped telling people after getting comments about how he is too young to settle down, how he hardly knows me, how we are moving too fast, etc. He just didn't want to hear all the negativity and I can't blame him.

From a friend saying we spend too much time together, to a family member saying "Don't you think that's a little fast?" when Jonathan gave me a key to his house, we're used to the criticism. That's life, I guess. People are always going to have an opinion. I'm sure you or your relationship has been criticized a time or two so you know exactly what I'm talking about. We typically brush this kind of stuff off because none of it matters. When it comes to relationships, my thinking is this:

If you aren't in the relationship, you are in no position to criticize it.

Anyway, getting back to our conversation on that most wonderful day, I reminded Jonathan that this is only the beginning of dealing with the opinions of others. If it's not people criticizing our relationship, we'll have people who don't like the food we have at the wedding or people who don't like the music the DJ plays. People will have an opinion on what we put on our wedding registry, what we choose to name our kids, how we discipline our children, the list goes on and on. We decided right then and there that we have to stay true to ourselves and we can't worry about what others think. Just because everyone is entitled to their own opinion doesn't mean we have to let their opinions affect us.

Unfortunately, as I'm wedding planning and making arrangements for us to move in together after the wedding, I'm finding this whole "don't worry about what others think" thing so much easier said than done. 

See, we have some decisions to make as we move into the next phase of our lives together. One of the more controversial decisions we've made is about our pets. Jonathan has a cat and as you all know, I have a dog. We both love our pets. Unfortunately, we haven't had much success in getting our pets to get along. I don't mean they haven't become best buds (I obviously never expected that to happen). I mean they don't even tolerate each other. We have to keep the cat locked in the bedroom while Blake gets the run of the house. If Blake sees the cat, he attacks. We've tried to introduce them on multiple occasions and we've tried a few different approaches. They are no closer to getting along now than they were the very first time we introduced them. Add to that the fact that Blake is really bad with children and you have a really difficult situation. 

While it's easy to say one of us just has to get rid of our pet, this just isn't fair. If I give Blake away and we keep the cat, Jonathan will always feel guilty and I'll always feel a little bitter about it and visa versa. Nobody wins in this situation. The only fair thing is for both of us to find a good home for each of them and start fresh. This breaks my heart, but I know it's the only fair thing to do. I also know that it will save us the stress and frustration of trying to manage both animals who don't get along.  I also can't imagine trying to bring children into our home with Blake being so bad with kids. I'll feel a little better finding Blake a new home with a close friend or family member, so that's what I'm hoping for. As you can tell, it's a tough situation. 

While I don't want people (my family, specifically) to criticize me for giving Blake away, I have to trust they know me well enough to know I don't take this lightly. I'm not a cruel person. I love Blake and the thought of giving him away breaks my heart. This is difficult for me, but I have to do what's right for Jonathan and I. At the end of the day, we have to live with whatever decisions we make. Other people may criticize, but that isn't something we can control, unfortunately.

Needless to say, I know we'll be criticized for this, and many other things throughout our life together. Heck, I'm sure a few of you are even judging me right now based solely on our decision about the pets.The worst part I think (and the reason I am writing this post) is that I am criticizing myself, too. I shouldn't be concerned with what other people think and especially need to stop judging myself. 

At this point I'm kind of just rambling so I'll just stop, but I feel a little better. Thank you for reading. This is why I blog, to sort out my thoughts and get things off my chest. At the end of the day, I'm not perfect, Jonathan isn't perfect...we are both just trying to do what is right for us. End of story. 

Ultimate Fan Giveaway

Happy Wednesday! I hope you're ready for this...

It's pretty huge. 

(that's what she said)

Okay, here goes. 

Who would like $215 to spend on tickets to see your favorite team play or your favorite band perform live?

Oh, you?

Well, today is your lucky day. I teamed up with Sarah and a bunch of other wonderful ladies to bring you the $215 Ultimate Fan Stub Hub Giveaway! No, this is not a joke. Sounds pretty awesome, huh?

Good luck! I hope you find some great blogs to follow in the process!

Rules: This giveaway is open to U.S. residents only Winner will be notified via email (after verification, no cheating) and will have 48 hours to respond and claim their prize. Otherwise, the prize will be given to the next in line. Check all terms and conditions below. Now go enter. WHOO! *Insert pumped up Jock Jamz song here*

 a Rafflecopter giveaway

Sometimes I just don't have anything to say.

I had every intention of blogging on Tuesday, but had nothing to say, really. I made my very first lasagna on Monday, but didn't take photos of my cooking adventure, so that wouldn't be fun to write about. I even spent Saturday afternoon drinking around the world at Epcot with my friend Alyssa. Unfortunately, I didn't take one photo of us at Epcot. Not even one. What kind of blogger am I? 

We did take a photo later in the night and have to share it because I must say we are looking pretty pulled together for drinking all day in the Florida heat.

Then I went to write a post on Wednesday, but I just wasn't feelin' it.

Here we are on Thursday, and I still don't have anything very interesting to say to you all.

Last night, Jonathan and I booked our trip to Clearwater Beach to celebrate his birthday next weekend and since then I haven't really been able to think about anything else.

All I can do is think about getting out of town and basking in the sun all day drinking fruity drinks with my love.

I love our life together. Every weekend we seem to have something fun going on whether it's a birthday celebration, graduation, family gathering, wedding or baby shower. With all of that stuff going on, my recent roommate stress and Jonathan working his butt off recently, we are definitely in need of a few days away just the two of us.

Basically, what I'm saying is I don't have much to say this week and I'm well aware that this post is pretty pointless.

In the meantime, if we could just fast forward to next weekend, that would be great. 

Hope you're all having a fantastic week!

Birthday Weekend Recap & My Birthday List

Happy Monday everyone! I have lots to tell you about after spending the weekend celebrating my 27th birthday and Mother's Day. It was a jam-packed weekend full of family and friends...it was just wonderful. As I do every year, I also have my annual birthday list to share!

First, let me tell you about Saturday. My birthday was on Sunday and not wanting to take away from Mother's Day celebrations, I decided to celebrate on Saturday. Instead of stressing myself out trying to plan a dinner and night out with friends and family, we decided to host a BBQ at Jonathan's house to celebrate my birthday. This way, whoever wanted to come could come and I wouldn't have to stress about making reservations and planning a night out. It was the perfect plan in my book. 

My parents, Jonathan's entire family, my siblings, my best friend, Taryn and tons of our friends showed up and it was such a blast. This was the first time our families were spending some time together and it was also Jonathan's first time meeting my best friend. Most importantly, our families hit it off perfectly and Jonathan and Taryn get along great. Having all of my favorite people in one place made me one happy girl. 

Jonathan gave me the absolute perfect gift...a key to his house. I've been spending most weekends there and have really come to consider it home. Giving me my own key was such a sweet gesture and I couldn't be happier with where we're at in our relationship.

So glad to have my momma there!

Best friend meets boyfriend.

After a long day of celebrating, we were ready for bed.

Sunday, after spending as long as possible snuggling Jonathan, I hit the rode for my parents' house for the day to celebrate Mother's Day. After going to lunch and getting in some quality time with my parents, I headed home to Jonathan's to enjoy the last bit of such a wonderful weekend. I couldn't be happier ending my birthday with a quiet night at home with my love.

And now, I bring you this year's birthday list. If you've been following along for a while, each year I come up with a different birthday list. My 25th birthday was a list of 25 lessons I've learned so far. For my 26th birthday, I came up with a birthday day bucket list. I kind of struggled coming up with a theme this year. I wanted to do 27 random acts of kindness, but didn't really get it planned out in time. I've been thinking a lot about how so many people my age freak out about getting older and it drives me nuts. I still feel so young and still feel like I have so much to learn and look forward to. Because of all this, I've decided to share a list of things I still need to learn. Here goes...I still don't know:

1.    How to dance (hey, just because I love to dance doesn’t mean I am good at it)

2.    My alcohol limits; when I need to stop drinking to avoid being a disaster

3.    CPR

4.    How to use a really nice camera

5.    How to go around making people smile all day and still pay my bills

6.    How to French or fishtail braid my own hair

7.    How to curl my own hair

8.    Okay, just how to do my hair in general

9.    The difference between hungry and bored

10.  How to leave the house without obsessively checking to make sure I turned off the straightener 

11.  How to cook eggs other than scrambled. Sunny side-up, omelets, over-easy, over-hard...I don't know how to do any of this successfully. 

12.  To speak my mind without worrying how people will react

13.  How to change a tire

14.  How to relax

15.  To have more patience 

16.  How to fold a fitted sheet 

17.  How to give a toast without crying

18.  How to argue without getting upset

19.  How to check my oil

20.  How to stop throwing a bunch of random crap in my purse. The other day I had two forks in my purse. Completely unnecessary. 

21.  How to get my dog and Jonathan's cat to get along

22.  How to get Blake more well-trained

23.  How to leave for work without driving back home to make sure I shut the garage door

24.  How to "do" my make up aside from the basic mascara and eye liner I wear most days
25.  How to pack more efficiently. I don't need 12 shirts for one weekend at Jonathan's, honestly.

26.  How to get mad. When I get mad, I just get sad and sometimes that doesn't help.

27.  How to do a cartwheel 

 

I've learned so much about myself and life in the last few years and I know there are still so many lessons to learn. I can't wait to see what wonderful things this year will bring. Cheers to 27 years!

Linking up with Sami for Weekend Shenanigans!

The Best is Yet to Be

Hello and happy Monday! You might notice quite a few changes around here. I've been so very excited to debut the new blog name, design, layout...basically everything! I've spent a lot of time over the past few weeks to make these changes, from brainstorming a new name to teaching myself how to add social media buttons to the blog. I'm so happy with the final product and I hope you all enjoy following along!

Why 'The Best is Yet to Be'?

I absolutely love my life. I'm blessed beyond belief. Adding to that, I've recently fallen in love with an absolutely wonderful man. In moments of overwhelming joy, it's hard to believe that things could be any better. It's true though. There are still so many wonderful things to look forward to...things I can't even imagine right now. I feel like 'The Best is Yet to Be' really represents where I am in my life right now. I'm soaking in the joy of the moment, but I'm also looking forward to all the wonderful things down the road.

With all these changes, here are a few things you should know about:

If you've been following for a while, you know I bake a lot and that lately I've even started cooking. I added a tab for recipes so that anytime I mention a recipe I've tried, I'll be sure to post a link to the recipe I used in case you are interested in trying any of them.

If you are new here, please feel free to check out the 'Best of the Best' tab. Here, I've chosen some of my favorite posts over the last 3 years. Instead of going through the years of archives, save time and check out my favorites here.

Since I'm no longer blogging under my nickname, Millie, I'll be closing the Twitter account (@MillieBlogs), I previously used for this blog and switching over to my personal account, @AmandaLTucker. I love keeping up with blog friends on Twitter, so please follow me on my personal account using the link above or use my fancy new social media buttons on my sidebar to get there.

In addition to switching Twitter accounts, I finally created a Facebook page. I'm excited to start following some of my favorite bloggers on Facebook, so please visit me there too!

If Facebook and Twitter aren't enough for you, follow me on Instagram, Pinterest and Bloglovin.

As always, thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!

Under Construction & Impromptu Photo Shoots.

Happy Monday everyone! I have things I want to blog about, but I am trying to hold off until I make some big changes this week. I've got a new name for this blog of mine and I'm really excited to debut it later this week (hopefully)!

In the meantime, please enjoy a few photos of me pretending to be photogenic.

While driving to my parents' house on Easter with my friend/roomie Laura, I told her about this awesome spot I had always wanted to take pictures at and next thing I knew, we were headed there for an impromptu photo shoot. I feel like the photos actually turned out pretty good considering neither one of us are experts in photography or modeling and we took all the pictures on our iPhones. Here are a few of my favorites:





 

 

 

We had so much fun snapping pictures of each other and I love that Laura is the kind of friend who loves to do spontaneous and silly things like this with me.

Hopefully I'll be back later this week with a new blog name and design. I hope you all enjoy your week!

Times are Changing

I'm so utterly fascinated with life. We spend so long talking about, dreaming of, envisioning what our future is going to be like. We think about meeting the person we want to spend our lives with, we wonder when we'll stop settling for less than we deserve and start to settle down, when we'll start cooking more dinners and having less wild nights out. Then suddenly one day you realize all this stuff isn't some far off reality anymore. You realize you are there. It isn't something you are hoping for, planning on, dreaming of...it's something you are living.

This is where I am. Over the past 3 years (almost), I have documented just about everything that led me to this place on this blog and I have loved every second of it. I've shared, sometimes in too much detail, my search for love; real love. I've shared my adventures and thoughts on who I am, what I stand for, what moves me, the mark I want to leave on this world. I've shared the "rainbows" and "storms" in my life and this blog has helped me survive the storms.

I didn't start a blog to be the next big thing in blogging, to turn it into a career or to make lots of money. I blog because I love to write. On a bad day, I can write and somehow sort out how I'm feeling. On a good day, I can soak in the joy I'm feeling by writing about it. I love documenting things and I love looking back on them later and being taken right back to the moment. This is why I blog.

With that being said, I feel like I am In a state of transition. I've found the love of my life and now rather than sharing my dating adventures, I want to share my thoughts on relationship dynamics and things I'm learning as I begin to build a life with someone. I still want to write about the fun things I do, embarrassing stories about my drinking too much, my thoughts on life and how I found a quote on Pinterest that really made my day.

Unfortunately, because of certain things I've written about, I've kept this blog pretty separate from most of my friends and family. I write on here under my nickname, Millie and I don't link my posts to Facebook or anything.

At this point in my life, I want to open the blog up to everyone, but would need to basically go in and delete posts I wouldn't want everyone to read. I would start a completely new blog, but there are so many non-dating related posts that I am really proud of and wouldn't want to lose. I also may not have a huge following on here, but I don't want to lose that either. I know I want to change the title and design, but I'm a little stumped on what to change it to right now.

Needless to say, I'm a little overwhelmed with where to/how to go from here. I'm also really excited about moving forward and making these changes. I hope you'll continue to follow along no matter what changes I make and please, any insight, feedback or ideas you might have on my next step, please share them with me.

As always, thank you for reading along. The fact that anyone is interested in what I write really means a lot to me. xoxo