Flowers & a Man Who Actually Called me on the Phone. Is This Real Life?

Hello world. I've been stuck in bed with a nasty cold all week, but yet somehow a lot has happened. This cold couldn't have come at a worse time. I still have Christmas gifts to buy, errands to run before my holiday trips and my workout schedule has been completely thrown off.

In the midst of all this, I absolutely need to post something here because things has taken an interesting turn in the last few days.

I met a really handsome guy downtown last weekend. If your single, you know that 9 times out of 10 when you meet a guy at a bar, the chances that (1) you'll actually hear from him and (2) that you'll actually want to get to know him outside of that environment, aren't very good. Nevermind the fact that you probably had a conversation about nothing at the bar and may not even remember it. Well this guy seemed a little different from the get-go. He bought me a beer and he asked about my job, my favorite books...not the typical "so, where are you from?" conversation most guys go with.

I was surprised to get a text from him Monday and even more surprised that he asked me out to dinner Tuesday night. Then something amazing happened. He picked up the phone and called me to make dinner plans. I can't tell you how refreshing it was to skip the weeks of awkward texting conversation that inevitably end up happening with guys I meet. I feel like so many guys (or maybe just the ones end up interested in) hide behind Facebook chat, texting...anything to avoid picking up the phone and talking like a normal human being. Getting an actual phone call from someone I had just met was such a treat!

Anyway, we met for dinner on Tuesday night and had a great time! Things that made me think I might like this one:

-when I walked up to meet him at the restaraunt, he shouted "You look beautiful!" I'm not one of those girls who needs to be told that all the time, but I've also dated too many people recently who couldn't even tell me they liked me, so it was nice to hear this from him.

-he brought me flowers. What? I haven't gotten flowers from a guy in years. We walked to his truck after dinner to get his jacket (which he made me wear because it was chilly and I was getting sick) and he pulled them out and handed them to me. It was sweet and thoughtful and not over-the-top cheesy. I didn't know how to react!

-I didn't feel like we were on a first date at all. The way he talked with me was like he had known me for a long time. It was comfortable and fun without the first date awkwardness that I am all too familiar with.

We ended the night with frozen yogurt and plans to see each other again tonight. I'm excited and pleasantly surprised by this whole situation.

I think I posted this quote on a blog post a while back, but it rings true for so many things in life including my relationships with people. I can't dwell on people who don't want to be in my life. I need to look forward and put my energy toward the people who want to be here.

I've had a tough time lately finally getting up the courage to speak my mind to people who haven't treated me fairly. I'm realizing when I stop putting my thoughts and energy toward people who don't deserve it from me, I make room for people to come in my life who do deserve my attention.

Unfortunately, this is a lesson I keep having to learn. I'll get it down eventually, but in the meantime, I'm excited to see what happens next. I just hope I'm feeling better in time for my date this evening!

Speaking up, Sea World, Being Crafty and a Runaway Blake

Hello friends. I have a lot I want to say this week and I don't know where to start. I guess I'll start by telling you about my weekend and figure out the rest later this week.

Sometimes when I reflect on the weekend, it's hard to believe I crammed so many adventures, mishaps, awkward moments and good times into such a short time. This weekend was definitely one of those weekends.

Saturday I spent the day at Sea World with The Dog Whisperer, his roommate and a lady friend of his. I hadn't seen and hardly spoken to The Dog Whisperer in a few weeks so I was feeling a little anxious. We had a really fun day and got to hit up just about every attraction they have. The dolphin show is by far my favorite show there and everytime I see it I am completely overwhelmed by how amazing it is. I also cry tears of joy everytime I watch it and this time was no different. Did our whole group think it's weird and hilarious that I cry? I think so, but oh well. Sea World at Christmas makes me ridiculously happy. They have fake snow and do Christmas versions of some of the shows. We fed sting rays, which if you've never done is really awkward because they basically suck the food out of your hand. We also spent way too long in the game area of Sea World and The Dog Whisperer walked away with a creepy amount of small stuffed animal prizes. It was a really fun day.

While I had a really fun day, I have to say that The Dog Whisperer treated me like nothing more than a friend all day. Because he's been sending such mixed signals, I've already backed off quite a bit so if he just wants to be friends, that's cool. It would be nice though if he would just say so instead of leaving me to figure it out on my own. It's exhausting.

My goals for Sunday were simple: at least start to decorate the house for Christmas. I'm saving the Christmas tree for this weekend when my roomie and I can go pick one out and decorate together, but I wanted to get some lights up, get the Christmas candles out and finally pack up the fall decorations. As I tend to do, I got a little overzealous and decided I was also going to attempt to make one of those adorable yarn wreaths I see all over Pinterest.

I wouldn't describe myself as crafty, but I used to scrapbook a lot and I can pull off pretty basic DIY projects. The problem is, that no matter what I do, I always end up spending 3x as much on the supplies and the project takes about 2 hours longer than the tutorial says it should. This is why my crafting days are few and far between. The good news is that I'm pretty happy with the result.

I didn't really follow any specific tutorial because there are so many online and honestly, this is pretty easy to make. Wrapping the yarn around the wreath is really more of a two person job (it took me about 2 1/2 hours and it is not perfect by any means), but other than that, it's pretty self explanatory.

I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty exhausted and mentally checked out after the wreath was complete and I hadn't even gotten around to hanging any lights yet. This explains how I didn't notice Blake walking right out the front door somewhere between me trying to hang the wreath on the door and standing in my kitchen sink trying to hang Christmas lights in my front window (side note: you can't help but stop and laugh at yourself when you're using an ice cream scoop as a hammer for an hour before realizing you have a tool kit in the garage).

When I was finally finished, I realized I hadn't seen Blake in a while. He hadn't been feeling very well and I kinda figured he gave up on following this mad woman around the house and went to sleep on the couch. I walked through the house calling his name and he was no where to be found. I started to panic realizing he could have been gone for an hour or two at this point. I had been so wrapped up in what I was doing, I had no idea when he got out. I started freaking out, crying, calling his name and as I ran outside to look for him, my neighbor from a few houses down was walking up to the door with him.

I was so relieved and panic-stricken that I brought Blake inside and cried like a baby for a good 10 minutes. Before you judge my parenting, I am usually much more attentive. Blake is still a puppy, so I don't let him out of my sight most of the time. I honestly don't know how he got outside without me even realizing it and it really makes me worry about my mental health. He would've had to walk right past me to get outside when I had the door open for goodness sake! The good news is that thanks to my neighbor walking his dogs, Blake didn't go far and I didn't end up having to roam the streets hysterically looking for him.

So yeah, to summarize: Hot mess, party of one right here. I'll get it together soon, I'm sure. I do know that though I feel like I am kinda falling apart, it's making me say and do things that need to be done. I don't ever fall apart without coming out of it feeling better and more secure with myself. So, there's the bright side. Oh, and I'm sure you would all agree that succeeding in any DIY project can make you feel like you could take over the world, assuming you don't let your dog run away without you noticing in the process.

Holy cow that was long. Thanks for sticking around to read it if you did and I hope you all had a wonderful weekend.

It's Okay Thursday

Linking up for It's Okay Thursday!

It's okay that I ate a York peppermint pattie at 7 a.m. today. My sweet roommate left a box of them on my bed  this morning with a lovely little note. How could I resist?

It's okay that The Dog Whisperer has turned out to be a complete disappointment. I liked him, I tried to get to know him, but he seems to have completely checked out I don't have the energy to beg for someone's attention. I'm disappointed, but it'll be okay.

It's okay to be in a bit of a funk sometimes. I'll snap out of it soon, I'm sure.

It's okay to say what's on your mind and not worry about how the other person will react. I need to work on being more okay with this.

It's okay to be happy and independent on your own, but also able to admit that you can't wait to find someone to share your life with.

It's okay to walk back upstairs 3 times before leaving the house in the morning to make sure you unplugged the straightener, even though it turns off by itself anyway.

On that note, it's okay to have a slight serious case of OCD.

It's okay to be overly excited about signing up for the Tap n' Run 4K. An easy 2.5 mile race with beer waiting for me at the finish line? This is perfection beyond belief.

What's okay with you today? Link up!

Any Man of Mine

Shania Twain’s “Any Man of Mine” is one of those country songs that never gets old. You have to hand it to her...the girl knows what she wants…

…a man who is proud of her, who loves her even when she is ugly, someone who is on time even if she is running late, who doesn’t mind when she changes her mind a million times.

How many of you have heard one of these phrases from someone every time you go through a break up?

“Well, at least you learned something…”

“Now you know what you are looking for out of a relationship.”

“There is someone better out there for you.”

These are all SO true despite the fact that nothing anyone can say will really make you feel better.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how every relationship does teach you something about yourself, about what you need out of a relationship and what you won’t stand for, about how when you do find that right person, all of the trials and tribulations will be worth it because it all brought you to this person.

I can’t help but think with the dating I’ve done and still have yet to do, all the “lessons” I’ve learned about relationships and the things I’ve learned I’m looking for in a relationship, that by the time I find the right person, I won’t realize it because I have way too many “criteria” at that point. I can’t help but wonder if “kissing lots of frogs before we meet our prince charming” might end up making us too picky, too selective.

I may be overthinking this, but I guess I’m a little nervous that the more you date, the more choosy you become, making it even harder to meet someone (or give someone a chance) who can make you happy.

Reminder to myself and those of you in the same boat: Let’s not forget to keep an open mind. It’s important to know what we want, but we also need to know that we want and what we need can sometimes be different. You don’t know unless you give it a shot.

The New Man in my Life

I have a boyfriend. I am in an actual relationship. I started seeing him a little over a month ago. Here are the basics:

 

How we met: eHarmony

Age: 31

Occupation: Operations Manager for a wine retailer

I have to admit that at first, I was very apprehensive about this one. To say that he is unlike anyone I’ve dated is an understatement. We have different views on a lot of things and we’ve both lived very different lives. He isn’t a typical guy in the sense that he isn’t afraid to talk about things and say what’s on his mind. Like me, he is very enthusiastic, energetic and positive.

For some reason, I’ve spent a long time thinking I needed someone a little more opposite personality-wise…someone a little more calm and subdued. I also had a lot of concerns about how we would fit together in light of the differences in our religious views and family life. Did I voice those concerns? You bet. I’m realizing that the differences are okay. He is not what I thought I wanted, but sometimes that’s what makes for a great relationship. I mean, what we want and what we need can be very different things, right?

source

Instead of focusing on our differences, I started to focus on the things we have in common and the things he brings to our relationship, things I haven’t been able to find in others. One night last week, he came over to cook dinner and after we ate, I suggested we play Twister. He laughed at me, but we played and had a blast! On Sunday, I told him I wanted to have a picnic. We spent the day in the Winter Park, playing Frisbee, laying in the grass talking, napping and drinking champagne and ended the day with a lovely meal and lots of wine at Luma on Park. He is totally on board with doing fun, spontaneous, maybe even silly things with me and we have such a blast together. It's very comfortable and easy when we are together. I like that. 

Why I Loved This Week

This week has been productive, fun and relaxing. After a few wild weeks, I kind of feel like I have things under control, which is good seeing as how the next few weeks are probably going to be nuts. Here are a few of the highlights…

• I finally spent some quality time by myself at home. I’ve been such a busy bee/party animal lately, I was starting to feel like I was never home. My house needed cleaning, my DVR was almost full and I needed some major down time. Over the last year or so, I’ve really come to value my alone time, so I’m really glad I forced myself to relax a little this week.
• We had our fourth kickball game last night. I had to miss last week for a work function, so I couldn’t wait! To recap: We lost 11-3, the really cute umpire (if that’s what you call them in kickball) was flirting with me, we had beer and jello shots in the dugout and I even got on base once, which is a huge accomplishment! I’m so glad I made the decision to join. Our team is a really fun group of people, most of whom I didn’t know before the season, and it’s a nice break from whatever I have going on during the week. I’m obviously not much of an athlete and we rarely win, but it’s a blast!

So nothing too crazy this week, but that was nice for a change. With my 25th birthday, a trip to the beach with my girls and a trip to Minnesota for a wedding coming up, this month is shaping up to be nothing short of amazing! Life is good J

Back on the….Horse?

And by horse, I obviously mean eHarmony.

I know. I can’t believe this is happening. I mean, how many failed relationships does a girl have to go through to learn that online dating just isn’t for her?

To be honest, at this point I’m surprised eHarmony didn’t respond to my signing up with an e-mail to this effect:

“We honestly don’t have anyone left to match you with. You have exhausted our database of men and you are now ruining our success ratio. Maybe online dating just isn’t for you.”

I don’t know what possessed me to do this, but the other day I logged onto eHarmony, finding out that I could get a three-month membership for SUPER cheap. I mean, I am a loyal customer at this point, so I should have some kind of perks. Before I could talk it out with anyone or even think about it myself, I was a member again.  I don’t know what I was thinking, other than the fact that I was disappointed, feeling rejected and knew that even if I don’t meet my future husband on there, being on eHarmony is a good distraction from my current situation and I guess you just never know what could happen. Anyway, if you read this post from back in December, Finding Harmony, I apologize for lying to you. So yeah, if anything, you can probably expect more entertaining date stories.

An Important Reminder (and an update, I guess)

I’m sorry I’m not giving many details of what is going on with The Red Sox Fan and I. Unfortunately, I have no clue what is happening, hence why I haven’t been able to put it into words. Things started out so great with us and I feel like all the good things have gotten lost somewhere in the mix. I feel like I keep waiting. Waiting for him to realize he wants to be with me, waiting for him to make an effort, waiting for him to be ready. I feel like I’m waiting for the person I met in January to come back.

On our first date, it felt like we were the only two people in the world talking for hours. On our second date, we had such a fun time, playing putt-putt, joking around with each other, talking nonstop. When we were sitting in my car at the end of that night, I remember feeling like I could have stayed there forever…just the two of us, sitting in my car, talking about country music and trying to get the courage to kiss each other goodnight. Even those first few nights where we just cooked dinner or watched a movie at his house, I had so much fun and felt so comfortable and happy.

I don’t know what to think. I’m confused, disappointed and at the same time, not really ready to let go yet. I’m also trying my very best to not let this get to me. If he just isn’t that into me, which he clearly isn’t, the most important thing is that I can’t let that get me down, which is why I am reminding myself and you all of this tonight:

Just because one person can't see your worth, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.